Norwich City v Liverpool: A Preview



Traditionally brought down into the mines as a Health & Safety tool. If they keeled over, you got the hell out, as there were clearly noxious gases present. Someone should put one in my bathroom some Sunday morning…just for an experiment.

We all know that the Premier League is full of noxious gas, mostly seeping out of Sam Allardyce, so Norwich City have done well to stay alive and out of the relegation zone thus far. They sit two points clear of the bottom three as they welcome a Liverpool side without a Premier League victory all year (alright, it’s only three weeks old, but it sounds way more dramatic that way).

Sam Allardyce
That’s not a football, it’s an air freshener


Norwich are coming off the back of three consecutive defeats in all competitions, and have conceded three goals in each game, against Bournemouth, Stoke and Manchester City. Alex Neil will be hoping to halt this mini-slump quickly as they have no breathing space over those below them. They have brought in Steven ‘Stevie’ Naismith to add goals, who is arguably the nicest man in football off the pitch thanks to his charity work. Last Christmas he paid for hundreds of homeless people to have Christmas Dinner, a very noble gesture. Mind you, some were perplexed at how small the turkeys were, they were almost as small as a canary….I’ve said too much.

Steven Naismith

Norwich fans are in the rare position of not being absolutely terrified about the visit of Liverpool to Carrow Road, following the departure of Luis Suarez. ‘El Pistolero’ had made it a personal crusade to destroy Norwich every time he played them, and few will forget his hat-trick at Carrow Road that included a sublime chip over John Ruddy from 50 yards.

Liverpool have lost 3 of their last 4 league games on the road and have serious issues as they struggle to keep it out at one end and put it in at the other. I know that sounds like a ‘Dear Deirdre’ problem, but it really is causing them to get screwed….

Dear Deirdre
There are no words…apart from those in the speech bubbles

Adam Lallana is a major doubt for the game which may force Klopp into making a tough call. Does he replace Lallana with Teixiera, who impressed midweek, or does he introduce Steven Caulker up front to allow Firmino to drop deeper in place of Lallana? There’s even a wild rumour circulating that Benteke may get the nod up top. Madness. Whoever plays, they should wear a Luis Suarez mask for the psychological edge.

Luis Suarez Mask





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